Monday, July 5, 2010

OK, the bee sting actually did suck

July 4th is my favorite holiday each year, and I hate to say that this year was terribly predictable.

I had a horribly wonderful weekend, complete with painfully mild, 85-degree weather and zero humidity.
Several friends came to visit during the unfortunate three-day weekend, and our house was filled with the annoying sounds of laugher and good cheer all weekend.

We donned obnoxiously cliché red, white and blue attire. We never ran out of beer, as much as we tried.

Could we get any more typical “American” than a visit to a pool, a trip to the beach and a luxurious boat ride around South Carolina’s remote islands?
How about watching a nearly 40-minute fireworks show from a boat with the terrifying popping and banging coming from above?

(The dizzyingly colorful sparks also made it practically impossible to notice the garish sky full of stars. I mean, I hardly ever get to see the Big Dipper, and my view was obscured with firework smoke, GAW!)

I awoke July 4th morning to five friends laughing in the kitchen and an illegally sugary, terribly delicious brunch on the table, complete with mimosas and my roommate’s notoriously unforgivable cinnamon bread. It was downright sinful.

In addition to the holiday being marked by embarrassingly drunk happy strangers everywhere shouting HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA! and wearing American flag bathing suits and bandanas, we also suffered through a gigantic C-14 plane doing a exhausting “patriotic” flyover along the coast.
The thousands of people on the beach all waved and whistled as it flew overhead, a terrible waste of energy because the pilot certainly couldn’t hear us.

That afternoon, while waiting for our friend’s dreadfully immaculate boat to pick us up at a super snooty marina, my twin sister, Joy, even got stung bitten by a large honeybee.

Joy cried in pain and had to get ice rubbed on the red lump on her back for at least a half hour, making it horribly uncomfortable to lean back on the extravagantly cushioned boat seats.

My calves are frighteningly sore from all the dancing I did every night this weekend — terribly grueling. All of this dancing was also to peculiar contraptions like mandolins, harmonicas and unidentifiable brass instruments.

I don’t know what I did to deserve such a terribly glorious weekend, or how I got such terribly wonderful friends. I mean, would it be too much to ask to have one thing go wrong? Could America’s birthday be a little less awesome?

Thank goodness I'm going to work tomorrow — and early, too. I miss structure. I miss emails. I miss wearing more than just a bikini.

And there certainly won't be any bees.

terrible, just terrible

Happy 4th y'all.



  1. 400 stung people die each year in the United States from their sting! Many of whom have been previously stung with no reaction! Why take the Chance by not being prepared? Prepare your first aid kit for any type of sting including jelly fish at:

    LAT: Bee sting victim died from severe allergic reaction

  2. Can a bumblebee sting or bite?

    Actually it can do both, but it mandibles (jaws) are not strong enough to cause any pain to a human, and are used mainly for moulding the wax for the cocoons, honeypots and pollen stores. Also the mandibles are rounded, so have next to no piercing ability. Some species, mainly Bombus lucorum, do use their mandibles for nectar robbing, but it takes them ages to pierce through a flower to steal the nectar, so human skin is in no danger. This is also why a bumblebee nest in the house will cause no damage as they cannot drill or dig. Workers (females) and queens can sting (see this page for photographs etc.), and they have an unbarbed sting , so could sting repeatedly(THAT WOULD EXPLAIN THE TWO BUMPS ON JOYS BACK), unlike honey bees, but rarely do. The only time I have heard of bumblebees stinging is when they have been roughly handled (JOY WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO ROUGH), or their nest or the entrance to the nest is being tampered with. I have never been stung (JOY HAS AND IT DID'NT LOOK PLEASANT!), and I have handled hundreds, measuring tongue lengths, head widths etc. I can honestly say they are the most accommodating insects to work with - hence my deep fondness for them.

    Joy are they "accomodating insects to work with"?

    Joy it was a sting, and it was a big deal! Im sorry.


  3. ummm...I was not too rough, maybe the poor bee was traumatized by the huge flip flop coming at him. That's no way to treat a queen!

  4. Flip flop swatterJuly 6, 2010 at 1:08 PM

    I was just looking out for the victim, the flippy floppy went flying after the sting. Then it flew in the harbor distracting the rescue operation. The queen lives to see another day as she flew away to find another boat passenger to land on.

    Bee 1 .... Joy 0

  5. Who throws a shoe? Honestly! You fight like a woman!


You might like...

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...