Tuesday, March 23, 2010

For Project Runway Fans…

I attended Fashion Week in South Carolina with wide-eyed wonder.
Models walking the catwalk? Here?
It almost seemed like an oxymoron.

But, no, this was real. On a particularly cold Tuesday, I found myself sitting in the front row of a long catwalk under a big tent in the middle of a downtown park, wearing my most fashionable purple top.

I was in the front row because I am a member of the media, and, therefore, fit to judge the outfits from up close.
I felt like Heidi Klum. Auf wiedersehen!

Now, don’t tell the bored-looking PR girls who gave me my media pass, but I wasn’t there to cover the show for the newspaper.

We had already run an article about the featured designer in last week's paper, so I was there for fun. And for fashion!

For that night’s show, several clothing stores downtown had put together a “spring collection,” including Banana Republic (man, do they love khaki!) and a new store that sells Seersucker jeans.

(Yes! Seersucker jeans! Talk about an oxymoron!)

Welcome to South Carolina!

As the models walked down the runway, I took mental notes for how to copy the looks from clothes I already own, and then thought about how terrible, yet funny it would be if one of the models fell (I may be going to hell).

Someone then interrupted my thoughts by tapping me on the shoulder.
“Is that seat taken?” asked an effeminate, well-dressed black guy.

“No, go ahead,” I said. He loudly stepped over the other chairs making quite a scene to get to the front row with a large camera and reporter’s notebook in his hand.

He started scribbling notes as the models paraded down the runway. I couldn’t imagine what he was writing. I snuck a peek at his notes and saw he had written down, “interesting pant.”
Haha. Pant. Singular.

Interesting pant indeed!

"Purple pant."

Later that week, I continued to abuse my Fashion Week media pass by attending the end-of-week gala (also under the big tent), which was quite the soiree.
Seventy bottles of vodka lined the walls and there was a very small platter of vegetables and cubes of cheese. I was not surpised.

Don’t tempt the models with food! Some are wearing leotards for Christ's sake!

My mom keeps telling me that no one pays attention to shoes, but that was certainly not the case at this party.
I actually saw photographers taking pictures of just people’s shoes, mom.

I wondered for a moment if my runway reporter friend refers to them as just “shoe."
The perfect shoe to complement the perfect pant perhaps?

I, for one, was not wearing the perfect anything to the gala that night.
The plan was to wear the most fashionable dress in my twin sister’s closet, but my spray sunscreen failed me that day and I got embarrassingly burned at the beach. The dress would have put my splotchy red arms on display for everyone to see. Not fashionable.

Really, I looked like a burn victim with an odd-shaped red slash on my body. I joked with my other media friends at the gala that some designer would try and use me for a charity.

"Just because she's deformed does NOT mean she can't be IN FASHION!" I imagined a designer saying, as I paraded out on the catwalk with a custom-made S-shaped dress strategically covering my burn.
"Look, now she's a swan!"

I ended up having to wear a shrug (yes, shrug! Fashion word!) which meant I had to change my outfit entirely which made me fashionably late to the gala. Ha

The music was hip and current, with lots of Lady Gaga songs that I didn't know, and I even got up and danced on the catwalk with a crowd of people. (Everyone was doing it!!)

Oh and I met a celebrity! Carol Hannah Whitfield, the season 3 final candidate for Project Runway!! Do you watch Project Runway? It’s one of my favorite shows. I keep trying to get people to watch it.

I’m a curious person by nature, and I had a ton of questions for Carol Hannah:

Do you still keep up with any of the other contestants? Yes.

Do people recognize you and come up to you, like, all the time?? Yes.

How much of the show is real? “99 percent.”


Me and Carol Hannah, y'all! Look, she's wearing a shrug too! Made out of...a sherpa??

Yes, it was quite the weekend I had imagined. Now, I know what you're thinking:
"Jenny, do you feel more fashionable now that you've experienced a real-life fashion show? Do you have any tips on how to act more like a model?"

The answer is no, not at all. My feet are killing me from the shoes nobody noticed, and I’m still sunburned.

But, this week I’m going to check out those seersucker pants. Ahem. Pant.



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