Tuesday, October 11, 2016

TOOLBAG TUESDAY

There’s a time and a place to ask a new girl for her number.

…And that time and place is not after your EX-girlfriend confronts you at a bar in front of everyone about the dog you share custody of.

(That doesn’t really make you a good candidate for a new relationship, Mr. Baggage.)

But that’s exactly what happened to my friend Rachel last week, who had been talking to a nice, cute guy all afternoon.

Rachel met three guys at a neighborhood restaurant where they have long community tables and they bonded over burgers and all decided to move to a new brewery down the street.

At the brewery, one guy named Robert zoned in on Rachel, sitting by her, asking her a lot of questions, buying her a beer.

After about an hour exchanging life stories, a blonde girl came into the brewery and tapped Robert on the shoulder. All of the guys looked at her, stunned.

“WE NEED TO TALK NOW,” she said. Robert tried to casually play it off, smiling at Rachel like there wasn’t a demanding blonde girl next to him.

His friends tried their best to look away.

“NOW!” she yelled and yanked him outside where they were clearly having an argument using their hands. After five minutes, Robert walked back in and told the bartender to close him out.

“Sorry, that was my ex-girlfriend,” Robert said to Rachel. “We share a dog and if I don’t leave right now, she’s going to take him away from me forever,” he said.

???????

(Ed note: That dog isn’t the only thing that got its balls removed LOL)

“What?”

“It’s a long story,” Robert said.

“Wait…how did she even know you were here?” Rachel asked. They had all spontaneously decided to go to the brewery.

“I don’t know,” he said and he signed his credit card receipt in a hurry.

Then he looked over at her.

“Hey, do you think I could get your number?” Robert asked.

Hahahahahahahahaha

(Hmmm…I guess he does have balls.)

Haha

Who asks a girl for her number while being dragged out of a bar by their ex?

That’s not a good look.

“No I don’t think so…it looks like you’ve got a lot going on already,” Rachel said.

Ha

Then she watched Robert hang his head and walk out of the bar, presumably, on his way to the dog house.

-Jenny

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