Tuesday, September 30, 2014

TOOLBAG TUESDAY

No, I don’t know what couples do with their finances when they get married.

I mean, I guess stay-at-home moms spend their husband’s money (side note: Luuuucky) but I don’t know what people with two incomes do.

Do they have separate accounts AND a joint account, like my twin sister and I did when we first bought a house together?

Or do they throw everything in one account and keep a hawk-like eye on each other’s purchases??

I don’t know, but the second one sounds pretty miserable.

Tara, my friend who was married to this guy Jeffrey, was in that miserable situation.  

She said she and Jeffrey had a shared account and he was adamant that she couldn’t spend ANY money on anything. 

She was basically working for HIM and HE controlled all the finances, paid all the bills, blah blah blah.

Tara said Jeffrey was so stingy with their money that OMG...he told her that they couldn’t afford for her to buy...uhhh...products for her time of the month.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was like a bizarre Seinfeld soup Nazi: 
NO FEMININE PRODUCTS FOR YOU!!!

OMG.

Did they NOT teach him about female reproduction in school??
Because the feminine products aisle isn’t optional, D-bag (hehe see what I did there, same aisle.)

But Jeffrey was insistent that they couldn’t "afford" it because they were “in over their head” on their mortgage.

“It got to the point that my mom was sending me care packages with tampons in them,” Tara said. “It was so embarrassing.”

WHAT HUSBAND SAYS HIS WIFE CAN’T BUY THAT??

No, WHAT GUY, period, says a female can’t buy that??

WTF!!

Sacrifice something else!! It's like $6!!!

(And run away as far as possible!!!!!!)

No surprise, their relationship went downhill very quickly, and Tara filed for divorce.

And Tara’s no bullsh*t lawyer found out that OH!!! They were broke and couldn’t afford tampons NOT because of their mortgage...

...but because HE WAS TAKING ANOTHER WOMAN OUT TO LUNCH EVERYDAY!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BLOODY HELL!

Seriously. A cheater!!! Spending $40 on lunch dates five days a week, putting them into debt.

>Jaw drop<
>head shake<
>side eye<

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God, IS THERE ANYTHING REDEEMING ABOUT THIS GUY????

A cheating loser who told his wife they were too broke to buy what she needed from Walgreens because he was spending it on another woman’s lunch!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He should never be allowed to have a bank account again!

Or, speak to a female.

Or, you know, BREATHE. 

Period.

-Jenny

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