Tuesday, December 31, 2013

TOOLBAG TUESDAY

It’s always nice dating someone who has a job that can improve your life.

Are you a chef? Cook me everything!!

Are you a banker/financial person? 
Teach me how to pay off my credit cards without altering my spending habits!! 
Ha.

By most accounts, Greg’s job as a NASCAR motorsports dealer (!!!!!) was super awesome.

My friend Gina reconnected with him after dating in college and even though they lived in different states, he brought her to several NASCAR events, one where she got to ride shotgun in a racecar during the opening round on the track.

(Some people like that. And earplugs.)

It was also awesome that Greg always had a sweet, really expensive car in which to take her out. They dated for about six months.

They weren’t his cars of course, they were company rentals, or whatever other leases that were available. It was super luxurious.

...Which is why it was super confusing that Greg chose this ridiculous excuse to sell Gina out at the last minute to a Dave Matthews Band concert she had been excited about for months: I got two flat tires.

Two.

TWO!

Who gets two flat tires at the same time?? Without FIRST running into a fire hydrant??

It wasn’t so much that MR. CAR CARE got a freak tire accident and noticed it exactly three hours before the concert that he was supposed to go to with Gina.

Or that he lived exactly three hours away.

It was all that PLUS he miraculously couldn’t get a replacement car…of the ten at his usually always disposal.

SERIOUSLY??

Gina asked him why he couldn’t change the tires himself, or why he couldn’t RENT a car from the rental car place, but he assured her that none of those options would work, even though he knew how to change a tire and he was really rich.

No matter how many ideas she gave him, he found a way to get out of seeing her.

It was fishy.

So fishy he could have SWAM to see her. Ha.

Gina and Greg got into a huge fight about it, of course, in which he said HOW IS THIS HIS FAULT?? STUPID TIRES!

Oh, and the shop where he got all his company cars was closed. At mid-day on a Friday.

It was no surprise that they had been fighting for awhile and Greg had been really distant lately. Not calling her back immediately, not visiting as much as usual, etc.

But if he hadn’t used the most OBVIOUSLY BOGUS excuse, maybe Gina wouldn’t have called him out.

(Not trying to give anyone ideas or anything, but if he had said he was having issues at work, or family issues or ANYTHING that wasn’t car-related, he could have bought some time.)

Because it was that excuse (and subsequent forcing Gina to scalp her extra concert ticket to a weirdo) that prompted her to pay him a little surprise visit. 

“Hi, I’m driving to see you…right now!” Gina said to him on the phone the next day.

“Wait..what?” he asked. “No, you can’t.”

“Oh, no? Why not??”

That’s when Greg admitted that he was not only cheating on her but he was now LIVING with someone else.

hahahahahahaha

WHAT!?!??! 

T…

F?????

“That’s really why I couldn’t come to town!” Greg said, not even appropriately sorry about it.

Then he went into a big thing about how it was his EX, and he just can’t let go and they’re "off and on" and were “trying it out.”

OMG.

Trying it out.

TRYING IT OUT!!!

WHO CAN LIVE WITH A GIRL AND HAVE AN EXCLUSIVE RELATIONSHIP WITH ANOTHER GIRL???

There’s nothing worse than hearing from your boyfriend that he’s living with someone else.

...Unless you’re in a NASCAR race and get two flat tires, I guess.

I, for one, would have blown a gasket.

Ha.

-Jenny

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