Tuesday, August 21, 2012

TOOLBAG TUESDAY

What’s ruder than hooking up with someone and having them say afterwards…“oh, I have a girlfriend back home”?

Yes. There’s something ruder than that.

Them adding, “But I’m totally fine with it, if you are.”

This is the compromise that Greg, a guy who lived in Canada, proposed to my friend Mia, who lives in South Carolina.

And it just kept getting worse.

Greg was a photographer, and incredibly good-looking, and found a niche taking pictures of marshes and lighthouses and sweetgrass baskets. As such, he flew to town every few months.

Greg and Mia met at a party, and hit it off. After his third trip back to South Carolina, two of which he and Mia had several sleepovers, Greg dropped the news.

“A GIRLFRIEND?” Mia asked, heartbroken.

No, they hadn’t discussed being exclusive, but they talked on the phone and on the internet regularly enough over the past six months that she thought she was the only one. At least the main one.

She was hurt and disappointed. Her dreams of falling in love with the hot Canadian photographer were shattered.

And she felt like a cheap wh0re.

What was she, some bedroom distraction while he built a life with someone else??

Someone he properly referred to as his “girlfriend??”

It was sad; Mia was going to hint that she wanted to visit him when he flew back to Canada the next day.

Mia, being one of my more level-headed friends, said matter-of-factly, “Look, I’m not gonna be that girl who hooks up with someone who has a girlfriend. That makes me feel uncomfortable.”

(P.S. Uncomfortable. A word guys understand.)

Greg responded as arrogantly as expected.

He said he was sorry Mia felt that way, because HE liked what they were doing, and “where they were going.”

Where’s that exactly, Greg? Oh, Nowhere?

Mia left the house where he was staying, visibly disappointed, and ignored his calls and texts.

She got another call from Greg later that night and picked up. He was drunk and pleading.

“I’m so sorry,” he said. “I really like you.”
Mia’s heart sank hearing him say that.

He then added, “Can you still bring me to the airport tomorrow?”

HAHAHAHAHAHA

….

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Serioulsy, I would have laughed that hard at him.

But, Mia said YES she would pick him up.

…At five a.m.

(Um. Maybe not so level-headed haha)

Her reasoning, she says, is that she wanted closure. She had spent all day thinking about him and them and she wanted answers about this “girlfriend.”

She wanted to tell him how much she liked him and wanted to know how serious it was with her. She was going to lay it on the line.

She arrived at the house at FIVE A.M. and knocked on Greg’s door.

He answered, messy hair, looking like he was still drunk. He was certainly not dressed and ready with his luggage.

“Hold on, I’m going to need a second,” Greg said wiping his eyes and walking back to his room.

Mia followed.

“Wait,” Greg said. “Don’t follow me.

“There’s a chick in there. I met her at the bar last night and took her home.”

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!

DUDE.

WHAT.
 
Who thinks this situation is OK???

How can you have your former hookup buddy pick you up at 5 a.m. to go to the airport the day after ya’ll break up, and casually have another chick in your bed??

WHEN YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND SOMEWHERE ELSE???

And why couldn’t THAT chick have brought him to the airport???

“Uh…see ya,” Mia said and walked back to her car, mortified.
She mentally threw away her, "I like you" speech.

She never heard from Greg or saw him in town again after that.

Good. Canada can keep him.
EH.

-Jenny

1 comment:

  1. Wow, just wow. It's crazy that there actually are people who behave this way. And the fact that you've had so many toolbag posts really shows that there's plenty of jackass fish in the sea.

    ReplyDelete

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